when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Randomize