Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Randomize
