we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
