He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
