I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
