He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
birth control should be required to get into college
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
