Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Randomize
