That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
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