you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
