Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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