can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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