So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Randomize