i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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