Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
