But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize