Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
