when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I will be naked everywhere
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
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