I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
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