@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
