Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
should my penis look like a turkey
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
