I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize