At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
