did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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