he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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