just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
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