Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
