Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
