last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
