i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize