What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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