the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
