She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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