I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize