no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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