My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
