i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
