Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Randomize