I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize
