The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize