trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
where am i from again
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
should my penis look like a turkey
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
