my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Randomize