so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
