No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Well I just put wine in my tea
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize