she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize