Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
