last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize