I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize