So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
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