Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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