He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i will never coherently bang her
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
