Whats the glycemic index on semen?
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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